i was asked about a writing like this a few weeks ago when i recieved an extremely high compliment. I’ve taken my time with it and deleted multiple beginning drafts because this isn’t a subject or a writing that itake lightly.
Slavery, submitting- it’s not a casual thing for me. It’s the way my brain is wired. It’s the way i think. Of course i make mistakes, i’m human, i’m bipolar and sometimes my brain short circuits.
i would like to say that of course i know what a slave is supposed to be. But i can’t say that. i can only say what a slave is supposed to be for me. For me it means watching what needs to be done and doing it before i’m told as often as possible. It means pushing myself to be all that my Master wants me to be. It means opening and offering my whole heart, mind, body, and soul. It means freedom, slavery is what frees me from the spinning color wheel that is my brain.
i’m rambling i know, but how do you explain to someone else who and what you are? This is who i am, i can’t be anything else. i’ m just myself, and myself is a slave. someone who watches. someone who serves. someone who just wants to please. Its all i know. It’s all i’ve ever wanted to be and i will never stop trying to be the best slave that it is possible to for me to be.